Look, let's hurry, I'm needed on the Roger Rabbit set
The Experiment
Yay, Joel's back and yes, that's a good thing. It's just too bad they couldn't bring him back for a better episode.We start off with a very strange explanation as to how they got Joel into the show with J. Elvis Weinstein going to a different dimension a thousand years into the future to bring him back to Kinga for the experiment. It seems like it was just a plot device used more to induce laughs with how absurd it is, but it comes off more confusing and unneeded.
For some reason, they used Emily's bots for this experiment, but then end up setting Tom Servo back to J. Weinstein voice. This idea has some merit, but also comes off as pointless nostalgia bait. This is a tactic we've seen entirely too often in media today and seems more like pandering.
The host segments were pretty terrible. Joel doesn't seem like he's with it at all. In fact, his interactions with the bots are downright stilted. Even the great Joel Hodgeson seems like he needs a bit of settling in before we get the full Joel effect.
Demon Squad
A Paranormal Investigator gets hired to find a dagger and some lady's father. Some other demons are looking for the dagger too and they are all incompetent.
What makes this movie bad?
Where does this movie go right? Out of all of the movies in the new series that gets everything wrong, this one is, by far, the worst. Not because of its actual quality, as bad as that is, but because it doesn't belong. This movie was created in 2019 and while that by itself is not grounds for dismissal, it is missing the charm of an older movie, or the "So bad, it's riffable" quality that so many of these terrible movies have. This movie simply wasn't a good fit.
The worst part about this movie, far and away, is the visual effects. That's visual effects both practical and digital were beyond horrific. The makeup made me cringe my face inside out with how bad it was. It is obvious that they just picked random locations and shoved in people with the cheapest, sloppiest makeup they could get for $2. The lighting was abysmal, the camera angles were either off or entirely too close to what what was going on.
Everything else about this movie is horrific, but just looking at it can possibly cause someone vertigo. This is a movie that belongs on the SyFy channel, not MST3K.
The Riffs
Like a peashooter against a panzer tank, these jokes did not hit. They couldn't get a running gag going, their delivery was stilted and they were practically invisible compared to how bad this movie was. Some of the riffs had a bit of a chuckle to them but then you go back to watching the movie and it just keeps getting worse and more nonsensical if you even attempt to make any sense of it.
The Episode
I hate to say it, believe me, I really, really hate to say it. This episode is worse than Beyond Atlantis. Saying that on the episode that was Joel's return hurts worse than anything else about this disaster. This is the kind of episode that makes you pine for the golden MST3K movies in black and white. Those episodes where the movie was really old, the acting was cheesy and the plotpoints were outdated. That's the kind of movie this season sorely needs rather than this garbage they found at the dollar bin. This is probably one of the few times I will ever say this, but it's better if this episode goes unwatched. Take that advice as you will but don't say I didn't warn you. On to the next, with a sigh.